When you practice compassion, don’t “feel” the pain. When you feel the pain, you don’t have any space left to practice compassion to anybody. Whenever you practice compassion keep very detached, with attachment…do you understand? This takes balance. “Compassion is something you hold, equanimity is how you detach.” Without these two together, only holding, holding, you will get so sucked into the pain of others that you don’t have the will and strength to continue to work. It’s energy draining, you’re already losing energy, you’re tired, you loose the energy to work.
These kind of things, honestly speaking, it’s not in the books, it’s something you have to practice practically. When I practice compassion, I say “Oh nyingye poor guy” (snaps) then in that very moment I bring up equanimity, emptiness meditation, equanimity. Right away I detach, without feeling the pain which drags you in. If you wallow in the pain you feel regret, you feel guilt, like you can’t do anything, you feel so bad, then you start blaming everybody, you start blaming the Sangha. Why do we do this? Compassion is something to DO, something good, not blaming others. That is practicality my dears, practical, practice, it’s not theory, Dharma practice is not theory… go IN to practice.
Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche